Sam Kissajukian | Animals Attack Me

Sam Kissajukian | Animals Attack Me

Last Updated: 15 Feb 2016
Hannah Lawrance

Ever been attacked by a shark? How about a chimpanzee? Stand up comedian Sam Kissajukian has, and he’s alive to tell the story.

Cats have nine lives, but Sydney comedian Sam Kissajukian has more. Being attacked by 13 different animals, he managed to escape them all. But he'd thank each and every one of them, because without them he wouldn't be dropping ROFL-bombs today.

Sam's show, Animals Attack Me, goes through his previous 10-year career travelling and doing adventure sports. This (wisely) chosen career path resulted in close-encounters with sharks, chimpanzees, mountain lions, bears and baboons.

Sam even salvage-dived in the past, and was surprised to find electric stingrays existed. "I was electrocuted four times by a numb ray," he says. "It's really weird being attacked by an animal you didn't even know existed, it's like being stabbed by a unicorn."

The comedian's friends thought it was pretty remarkable that he made it out alive on all occasions, so they forced him to relive the horror (with the hope of no PTSD) at a story telling competition one night. Sam made a joke or two, people laughed, and he's been doing stand-up ever since.

"People seemed to enjoy the concept of me being attacked by animals," he says. "And I wanted to bring the show to Perth for Fringe World this year."

Being only his second year at Fringe, we're pretty curious as to what we can expect.

"This one time I threatened to tell the audience nothing but dad jokes and a woman yelled, 'no need, you are your dads joke'," he says. "Unfortunately she's dead now."

We would be scared, but with the nickname 'Skinny Moustachie', we're not quite quivering in our boots. Although, evidence suggests 13 animals clearly were.

"I swear I don't seek them out," says Sam. "The problem just arises when we meet. I act tough, but they see straight through me to the terrified little girl inside."

#Animals Attack Me# will delve into the shark feeding frenzy at Sam's feet, spear-fishing with a vegan, being chased by a baboon with a machete, and many more adventures.

For a show that's a bit more brutal (but just a bit), check out #Comedy Boxing#.

"Comedy Boxing is where I battle another comedian over five rounds," says Sam. "Each round we destroy each other mentally, emotionally and physically." He says audience heckling is encouraged. Ouch.

Animals Attack Me
Elephant & Wheelbarrow
53-55 Lake Street, Northbridge

Tuesday February 16, 2016
6:30pm
Tickets from $20

Wednesday February 17, 2016
6:30pm
Tickets from $20

Thursday February 18, 2016
6:30pm
Tickets from $20

Friday February 19, 2016
6:30pm
Tickets from $20

Saturday February 20, 2016
6:30pm
Tickets from $20

Sunday February 21, 2016
6:30pm
Tickets from $20

Comedy Boxing
The Hidden Bar
69-71 Aberdeen Street, Northbridge

Wednesday February 17, 2016
7:45pm
Tickets from $20

Thursday February 18, 2016
9:30pm
Tickets from $20

Friday February 19, 2016
7:45pm
Tickets from $20

Saturday February 20, 2016
7:45pm
Tickets from $20

Sunday February 21, 2016
3:00pm
Tickets from $20

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